A classless society

Marx, Engels, Lenin, Stalin!!

Mao, Khrushchev, Ho Chi Min!!!

Sounds like a two line poetry, isn't it? And why not, such a poetic sounding entourage who also happen to be the ultimate champions of another poetry......Communism!!! Now why I call communism a poetry is because each and every individual has his or her own interpretation of it (I have been told that even nursery rhymes like Humpty Dumpty, Jack n Jill etc  have different interpretations!!!!!). And yet every one understands its basic theme......A classless society!!!! Seriously?? That's it?!!! Then every student in this world would be a communist (Now this is my understanding of Communism)!!!!

Absolutely trust me on that as students would be right at the top of the list of most indoctrinated and absolute communists. No one in this world hates engaging in classes more than the students. And it is my belief that no one  loves them more than our neighbourhood Sharma, Verma or Khanna ji and his distant relative's prodigal son or daughter (Let's brand them capitalist!!!).

Now putting my theory of Communism in this world as I understand it, we have the champions of classless society and the detractor capitalists who want classes to exist. It is my belief that the capitalist's prodigal relatives too want a classless world where classes, assignments, projects simply should not exist. And since they can't express themselves, it happens to be my solemn and moral duty to liberate the prodigies!!! Let me go and pick up a fight with Mr Sharma, Verma or Khanna. The same neighbours who might have given me a lift on a rainy day or chased away a thief from my terrace. Only because I believe that I am a communist and a victim of capitalism needs salvation through me!!! I may do it as well!!!

And when I want to rewrite the initial rhyme with hint of my name, my heart still croons.....

Marx, Engels, Lenin, Stalin!!

Mao, Khrushchev, Ho Chi Min!!!

I don't fit here!!! Damn....I have a class tomorrow morning, need attendance!!! 

Steamy affair with blood and gore!!!!

Many people have very romantic notions regarding evening and night. Candle light dinners, ball room dances, suave discotheques and what not!!! Yet a supposedly marginalized  section of society who also think that they happen to be the children of lesser gods have a very different experience which is as scandalous as it can get!!!
It is the steamy experience of sauna that many would love to pay for. But the moment it is free of cost, its brand value gets diluted!!! And we the children of lesser gods are left to deal with this diluted brand and the eternal angels of action, dance, drama and music. Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you the mosquitoes!!!
Ultimate success of evolutionary cheekiness has ensured that they manage to stick around and play their part in our "steamy affairs". Skillfully managing to spot one area of vulnerability,  they for sure bring action in our otherwise lazy and neglected lives. Extra points for treating us like free vending machines and soothing the heart by reducing its workload (lesser the blood, lesser the workload).
Notwithstanding the benevolence of such a noble creature, man has come up with umpteen concoctions so that we might remain lazy and comforted. Yet, the concoctions fail to dampen the spirit of the noble mosquitoes who have inspired scores of B grade Hindi films!!!
But the whole scenario becomes dangerous and personal when people decide to take up matters actually in their hands. Self hurting splats and swats try to master the indomitable angels. And success means.....a scene right from some Tarantino movie!!!! All blood and gore with the creature's existence dissolved in it!!! Many wished they had not done it for the sake of hygiene!!! Yet as a second mosquito whizzes past the ear, it is time for action again!!!! That steamy affair with blood and gore!!! SWATTTTT!!!!!

Crazy physics!!!!

It is absolutely normal to have happening lives (I am not kidding!!). But what if the whole world conspires to make it otherwise?? A sleepless night, a horrible fight, a couple of submissions (trust me, even one does the trick), a lost badminton racket or an early morning class, each one of them are enough to destroy your day. And all hell breaks loose on someone who is unfortunate ( the term in civilized world is "busy") enough to encounter them in one go!!! God bless him or her!!

Yet that extraordinary day is commonplace in the campus!!! Drained of all hope of redemption (I learnt this word from a famous movie!!!), I and many of you sometimes take a flight of stairs to meet our torment on the first floor. And if god has decided to be harsh upon you, the second and subsequent floors!!!

The other day, I had another such "extraordinary" day. And I had been sentenced by fate to a second floor voyage. A few steps up and I started doubting the basic concepts of physics which claim that gaining height makes you gain energy (remember potential energy= mgh??), but here on the contrary I felt as if I was giving up my last humane reserves!!!! Still climbing up, after the first floor I was in a colourful state of mind after seeing a few pretty faces. Ignoring the imbalanced load of laptop and copies in my hand, I was ready to defy logic and gravity to reach my destination as soon as possible when for the second time I cursed physics!!! With a crashing sound, my laptop and copies lamely surrendered to the overwhelming overlordship of gravity. Picking up my humble belongings, I resumed my journey and as I reached my destination and encountered.....Murphy's law (The damned law must also be a law of physics!!!)!!
Closed doors greeted me and I had little choice but to go back from where I started, but why on earth was physics with me now??!!! I was supposed to lose energy now, right?? But on the contrary I was gaining it!!!!
Damn the crazy physics!!!!

When a desi goes videsi!!!!

It is not at all a surprise to be daily bombarded by a barrage of exotic photographs from your friend in arms who was supposedly on a student exchange but was apparently more on a foreign trip.

Green valleys, snow capped mountains, pretty girls, happening parties etc, you name it and he was having it!!! And the situation becomes graver when a passing mosquito decides to treat you like a roadside soda parlour. Yet somewhere at the back of mind I knew that he was just enjoying his time.

Until one fine day (actually night), a somewhat familiar and irritating Facebook ping announced the fulfillment of the ultimate Indian dream for my buddy!!!!He was in the local newspaper!!! Curious, I started reading and was encountered by something like this:

“Die lange nasskalte Zeit scheint endlich uberwunden…….”

Now how on earth is an Indian, born and brought up in India on a staple of Bollywood films and Shakespeare supposed to understand this??!!! Flabbergasted, I tried reasoning with my “Desi baba”, who had insisted upon me to read it. And what I saw on the messenger window, was it the same language as that of the newspaper?!! Yes!!! It was!!!

Achtung!!! Ich!!!Danke!!!

Now how “local” the newspaper was and what his achievements were was of no more interest to me. What interested me more was the meaning of these new words that my friend had learnt. And why not, a few points of parity are definitely to be maintained between friends. And hence, the great achievement of my friend was lost in the quest of a “desi” who was trying hard to bridge the “German gap”.

And the next time my friend pinged me, I surprised him with “Guten Morgen”.

Sleeping sickness or the sleeping beauty!!!!

Waking up at 3:15 p.m. and rubbing my poor eyes, realization dawns upon me that I have just missed a class!!!!! Scary!!!!!
My mind suddenly starts working over time and a checklist appears......
Last class done....check
Number of classes missed is below two.....check...uncheck...recheck... what the heck!!!
And the world's greatest "What if analysis" is kick started in my mind....what if it is the second miss?? or a third miss?? Should I submit a sick leave application??...etc. etc. etc.
But with each passing moment I was slowly entering in to a state of mind which has ruined many a life....the state of "Chalta hai" and "Dekh lenge". And trust me, the placebo effect that this mental state creates brings with it an awesome state of ignorant's bliss.
Ah!!! As I talk about it, I need some inspiration!!!!

A presentation fiasco!!!!

As it mostly happens with happenings of unprecedented redundancy, people start taking such things very lightly. Yet a shake up or wake up call is enough to remind one that things are to be taken up as they are supposed to be!!!!

Confused??!!! So was I!!!! And that too until today morning, when an extraordinary "shake" brought me out of my comfort zone and on to this last refuge of mine!!!

Giving presentations has never been a big thing for me (at least I thought so!!). But suddenly today morning I found myself in a position that could be best described as..........dumbstruck!!!

Going through each and every point of my slides was a man who found nothing right in them and adding insult to the injury were a merry band of harmless (that is what I think they are) classmates.

Damn it!!! I thought!!! And the more I damned the situation, the more damned I was left!!

Every point on my slide was countered even before I could utter a word of explanation. All I could do was to deal with my silent mouth which was still open from the last attempt to explain and an improper gesture that my hand had mapped for my gagged words.

Seriously speaking, I felt more like a hapless mime artist than a presenter who was trying to express through only gestures.

Left sulking at the center stage (It might well had been the center of hell), all this lasted for exactly one hour ten minutes and a few more painful seconds (I am serious!!!).

And hence came to an end one of the most horrible (by conservative estimates) ordeals of my life in recent times.

And as I try to enjoy a beautiful evening, the morning still haunts me and a harmless classmate again makes sure that I can't!!!! Damn it!!!! I hate harmless people!!!!